One of my goals this year is to do things that are special. And by special I mean those things that fuel me up as a person and make time stop.
You know those people you can hang out with and you check your phone to see what times it is and gasp – “Oh my goodness, where has the time gone?!” Those are special people who make time stop.
For some reason I don’t make it a habit to do special things like that. Sometimes I feel guilty for doing them – for wanting to do them. I have the runner earning her dessert mentality. Before I allow myself the treat of indulging in something sweet, I need to make sure I’ve done enough throughout the day to merit a reward.
So in turn, my brain has labeled fun, special things as treats for good behavior rather than fuel for the run.
The other reason I don’t habitually indulge in special things is because I want to save them. It’s like hiding a bag of Dove dark chocolate for the perfect occasion. The problem is that when that perfect occasion rolls around, I forget about the chocolates I hid until I go through a cleaning streak and find them shoved in the back of my nightstand drawer.
Recently I read a book by Rachel Hollis called Girl Wash Your Face. She reminded me of the importance of making time for those things that are special and fill me up. When I spend time doing special things, it makes me a better mom because I’ve refueled myself and therefore have more to give those I serve. And the best part is that I can do it guilt free!
While reading Rachel’s book, I grabbed my journal and pen and wrote down a list of things that I truly love doing. Things that make time stop for me. A few of the items were reading for fun, writing/blogging, having people over for dinner, shopping/ time out with friends, and cooking by myself while listening to music…
Now that I have this list, I can make time for these things. It’s so freeing to learn about yourself and work with how you’re made rather than fight against it.
For example, now that I’ve identified that having friends over for diner energizes rather than drains me, I can be intentional about doing it. It can go at the end of a stressful week because preparing for it is fun for me. I have an excuse to crank up the music in my kitchen and cook, which crosses three items off my special things list in one whack!
This is freeing for me!
I think a lie I’ve believed in my head, although never verbalized, is that my special things should include my kids. But the truth is, they don’t. And that’s OK. It doesn’t mean I’m a bad or a negligent mom because I look forward to times without my kids.
As I’ve thought about this, honestly, I want my kids to see me doing fun, special things without them. Then they’ll look forward to being an adult and doing their own version of special things. If they’re always with me doing my special things, then they have nothing to look forward to!
As my friend Brooke says, If everything’s special, then nothing is special.
So, what is special to you? How can you make time to do those things?
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