Have you ever had a morning where you felt so bad about how you left your kids at school that for hours afterwards you contemplated snatching them up and whisking them off to Disney World to make up for it?
A couple of weeks ago, I pulled away from dropping my two boys off at school feeling like an utter failure as a mom. They had tears in their eyes. I had tears in my eyes. The day was off to a terrible start for everyone.
It was the kind of morning where nothing seemed to be going right. Breakfast was a disappointment, we were leaving the house late, and the notifications on my phone were already going crazy. I let my stress and disappointment in a situation bleed over into our morning together.
Needless to say, I beat myself up all day. How could I have let myself get so frustrated and take it out on the boys?
We can’t hold ourselves to a standard of perfectionism as a mom. Being a mom has taught me lesson after lesson of the need to give myself grace. I have let my kids down many times, even with the best intentions, but they are quick to forgive and forget. Most of the time they are thinking way less of the situation that I am beating myself up for.
Later that day, both of my boys jumped in the car after school, the morning drama all but forgotten. Their forgiveness and grace humbled me once again.
Here are a few of the lessons of grace I have learned along the way of being a mom.
1. Cut yourself slack.
We hold ourselves to a standard of perfectionism as a mom but there is no such thing. We want to give our kids the world and when we fall shy of that we think we are a failure as a parent. It just isn’t so.
2. Ask for forgiveness.
The thing I am willing to do most often is tell my kids that I am sorry and ask for their forgiveness. They see me fail and be willing to admit when I am wrong. This is the biggest lesson we can teach our kids. The lesson of admitting when we are wrong and asking for forgiveness.
3. Start over.
It is okay to just simply start over with a new day. Don’t hold on to your past mistakes as a mom. Learn from them and move on to better things.
4. Remember that you are thinking about it way more than they are.
We are talking about simple things here, like raising your voice or being short tempered when you are feeling stressed. Not physical or harmful actions. After picking my boys up yesterday from school I was armed with the best apology. They got into the car bouncing with excitement to tell me about their day, our morning of frustration all forgotten. They hadn’t been worrying about it all day or beating themselves up about it like I had.
Show yourself grace. Let go of perfectionism. You are enough, imperfections and all.